Right Down Peachtree

Have you seen any of these men? If so, chances are you were one run ahead of them:

Now, I could make some kind of cheesy "stealing home" joke here, but suffice it to say that should any of our Braves find themselves in a spot of trouble, there's no need for a mug shot. Especially Kotsay (lower row, second from right). He looks like he just got dragged away from a bar fight.

Thx to my blog-mate Lizzy Westby for the observation. And if you do want to vote for the Braves as All-Stars -- which I heartily endorse -- go to atlantabraves.com and make your voice known. You can vote up to 25 times, just like in Ohio or Florida.

And now it begins ... the long slow march through the summer, where we've got nothing but Braves baseball to occupy us. It's one of the more promising summers I can remember; the Braves are playing well, and we can look forward to a Georgia football team expected to compete for a national title, a Hawks team who'll make another playoff run, a Falcons team that probably won't be led by a dogfighting QB, and a Thrashers team that ... well ... a Thrashers team that gets a couple months off to chill.

Anyway,  let's focus on Los Bravos. Despite a tidal wave -- nay, a veritable tsunami -- of injuries, the Braves are barely a scotch out of first place. And we all know Florida's going to fall apart soon enough, so screw them. Let's talk about some of the major stories making the rounds of Blogfrica.

Can Chipper Jones hit .400? UmpBump thinks it's a good possibility. Hell yeah, UmpBump!

This poor guy hasn't been able to watch the Braves live all season. Playing the "what channel are they on tonight?" game every night gets wearying, but it's better than nothing.

Smoltz in the pen hurts the Braves' chances. This cat makes a good case.

A report on what's shaking down on the farm in Richmond.

Seen any good Atlanta sports stories/links/posts? Hit me up at rightdownpeachtree@atlantamag.emmis.com with the info.

Hey all, sorry for the couple days' absence from these parts. Had a big deadline for the Braves book, so I've been living in 1995 for the last few days. I sure wish that O.J. trial would just wrap up and find him guilty like we all know they're gonna do anyway.

Anyway, back in 2008, the Hawks wrapped up their outstanding playoff run with a butt-whipping at the hands of the Celtics, and general manager Billy Knight gave the city a gift by deciding not to come back to the team when his contract runs out June 30. I've never met Billy Knight -- seen  him a few times in the hallways at Philips, but never had the chance to talk to him -- but I think that the evidence shows that he simply didn't get the job done in Atlanta. The Hawks were one fortunate bounce from missing the playoffs yet again; if the Hawks hadn't gotten the #3 pick that became Al Horford, they would have forfeited the pick to Phoenix as a result of the Joe Johnson deal. And except for Horford, Knight's drafting record was abysmal.

This being the Hawks, though, they're gonna screw it up. Word is that they're considering the 76ers' Billy King, one of the few GMs who comes with less cachet than Knight. And other word is that this means Coach Mike Woodson's job is safe for another year. This, in a year when two of the last four coaches of the year are available. Why, that's almost as stupid as drafting another 6' 7" swingman when Chris Paul and Deron Williams are still available!

My article on the birth of the Atlanta Dream is in the current issue of the mag; they'd probably prefer you pick it up in stores, but you can read the piece by clicking here. (Click on a couple ads here and there, too, to make everybody feel better.) It was a bit of a strange piece to write, because I had to approach the subject not from a sports perspective, but a sociological one. (I also had to ditch the wiseassery; that stuff doesn't play nearly as well in the "serious" section of the magazine. See how lucky you are to get the primo stuff here?)

Anyway, the WNBA is a tough sell in any market, and especially so here in Atlanta. So the founding braintrust of the Dream has tried a different approach:

Watch an NBA game, or any professional sport, long enough and you may start to wonder what the point is, why we reflexively lavish civic praise on largely indifferent athletes, why we’re thrilled when they toss a sweaty postgame jersey into the crowd or spend an hour on a hospital tour for the cameras. What if someone turned the typical city-team relationship on its head? What if, instead of a basketball team serving as a community inspiration, you put together a team of community leaders who just happened to play basketball?

The first games begin later this month, and hopefully there'll be enough success to justify the years-long effort that went into this.

What happened to our lovely Braves starting rotation? We're here on the first day of May, and the rotation that had everybody stoked -- hell, one idiot even said we'd have three fifteen-game winners -- is in complete tatters. And since I finally got around to watching the Cloverfield DVD last night, I noticed some similarities between our pitchers and the poor little folks that face down the monster. (Spoiler alert: if you haven't seen Cloverfield, read no further.)

The guy on the bridge that gets stomped into the river three minutes into the siege: Mike Hampton. Hampton didn't even make it into the season before falling apart, and that kid is probably ready to kill his agent after getting killed in the film's first reel.

The chick that gets bitten and then explodes: John Smoltz. She soldiered on as best she could, but finally blew to bits. Smoltz: ditto.

The guy who goes back into the monster zone to rescue his girl: Tom Glavine. He could've re-signed with the Mets, but he came back here thinking he could rescue the Braves. Oooops.

The girl who gets rescued, but eventually gets blown up by the military as collateral damage: Tim Hudson. He was doing so well, and then got caught up in all this horror. Poor bastard.

The girl who gets away in the helicopter (we hope): Jair Jurrjens. He might be the only one to survive this whole mess.

The guy watching it all unfold before him until he gets eaten by that jackass beast in New York: Us.

A few quick-hit bits this Wednesday afternoon:

• Will Smoltz head back to the bullpen? I dunno, but damn, the promise of this season has crumpled in a hurry, hasn't it? [AJC]

• I know, I know, it's sacrilege to talk about this kind of stuff right now, but Avery Johnson is suddenly available, and I can think of one team that really could use a new, more inspiring coach ... [ESPN]

• Some must-read stuff on the split between sports blogs and mainstream media. Will Leitch of Deadspin got ambushed last night on HBO, and the way he was bludgeoned by Bob Costas and Buzz Bissinger created a huge divide where there didn't need to be one. [Deadspin, video on Awful Announcing]

More later. Go Hawks!

 

The Hawks played their finest game in a decade last night, and all of a sudden, the mighty Celtics are -- well, not on the ropes, certainly, but not exactly mouthing off too much. And you know what? I picked this two weeks ago, folks:

The longer the series goes, the more the odds work in Atlanta's favor. Once this series hits 2-2, we need to get the mainstream media to start running those "choke" stories--none of the Big Three have ever reached a Finals; KG, Pierce, and Jesus Shuttlesworth can't win the big one--and get all up in their heads. Hey, if Atlanta can reach the playoffs, anything is possible.

So allow me to start the pile-on here: the Boston Three Party is gonna chooooooke! Come on, who's with me? First the Patriots, now the Celtics, next the Red Sox! We're gonna end this Boston hegemony once and for all!